LL Narrative Essay

 “It’s not the destination, it’s the journey” Ralph Waldo Emerson. Every bilingual has a tale to recite about his path in learning a different tongue, especially when it begins late in life, such as at the age of twenty-three, when I decided to embark on this path of studying English as a foreign language. I can recall several situations when I truly battled to conquer them. In my country, Jordan, although English is spoken as a foreign language, one cannot find a job, get a promotion in a job, or make any progress in a career without the English language. I will include a couple of the most difficult moments that occurred during the earliest stages of my quest to learn English, which is typically regarded as the most difficult period of learning a new language.

I used to be an aircraft technician with the Royal Jordanian Air Force (Figure 1). In 2014, I decided to improve my life and pursue a B.A. degree. I applied to university, and after a year of struggling to get permission to begin a degree, they told me the only major compatible with my career was English language and literature, which I had barely considered, not because I disliked the English language, but because I couldn’t even remember the English letters at that point in my life. Over and above, I failed only the English course in the secondary education exams. Never mind, I had no choice, I had to accept the challenge or stay where I was, guarding the fence from ghosts (Figure 2). As it was yesterday, I still remember when the professor distributed the first handouts and how I could not read the title, it was the story of the Scandinavian hero Beowulf and his fight of vanquishing the monster Grendel and Grendel’s mother. It is no secret that the language of this story is difficult to interpret, at least for someone who has never been exposed to any literature text in English. I am still not sure about how I could cope with this epic story while my first concern was the English letters.

The first semester, I was worried about the lecturer requesting that I stand and say the English letters, which has changed to be a motivation later. Therefore, I decided to start engaging in class and breaking down the barriers by participating in the class and raising my voice. It was the most challenging period in my academic career, as I, at that time, used to give much attention to what they were going to say about me, but I had no other choice. The pupils couldn’t stop themselves from giggling at my crude language. I don’t blame them; my language was terrible, as I used to hear to myself when recording the lectures for review later. What made things even worse was my mental status—not only my language but also the notion that I was not intelligent enough to speak English. This semester ended with only one idea in my head I do not belong here.

The next semester, things became considerably worse. In my second year of college studies, I enrolled in a listening comprehension course. The material was tough since it was the first time I had to listen to diverse English dialects and accents and immediately interpret them. I was only able to grasp fragments of sentences. At that point, I realized I had a serious issue with my listening abilities and needed to address it. I felt frustrated, and my quest came to an end when I saw no way out.

I went to the professor’s office to ask for assistance on how to solve this situation and if there was anything I could do fast because examinations were approaching. He informed me, “Listening competencies improve with time, and there is no immediate solution; I urge you to start listening to music, news, and broadcasts as much as you can. After that meeting, I considered abandoning the course. There was still time to drop out, so I decided to try again and follow the professor’s recommendations, immersing myself in spoken English as much as possible. My dissatisfaction grew over the first month of the semester by watching the students participate during lessons while I was unable to do anything. Even though the professor tried to help me by asking whether I could tell or interpret what the speaker was saying in the recording, I was unable to make any progress.

I started listening to songs randomly such as Let it slide, Show me the Meaning, and Say Something. These are slow melodies, and I could definitely follow along with the words that were used. Additionally, I started watching Friends which several students suggested to me. In the first exam, I received about 13 out of 25. That was the lowest grade I ever received in the B.A.

   I received nearly the same grades on the second exam. I didn’t want to drop the course simply because it wasn’t my method of handling my problems I constantly recalled what Professor Kefah, an English literature professor, said about collapse and failure: “Regardless of what others might say about you, the important thing is not to be a failure in front of yourself and then be a prisoner of that idea for your entire life.”. The situation persisted with me until I arrived in the classroom for the final exam, when I scribbled my name on the answer sheet, certain that I would do similarly to previous assessments. Something odd happened when the record started: I was able to comprehend spoken English as if it were Arabic, my native language. When reflecting on what happened, I believe I made some progress in my listening skills because I unconsciously placed myself under pressure to listen to diverse English every day for hours. Another advantage was that the person in the recording did not talk rapidly, and the lexicon was accessible. Well! I finished with an excellent GPA from both degrees and was named to the Academic Honor Roll more than four times on the college list and once on the university list. Maybe you wonder why there are no graduation pictures. Simple because I did not attend both proms, B.A and M.A; I did not want to feel that I achieved something and, the second reason I was thrilled with my G.P.A.

Short Story